[an account of assurance]
part V :: surgery virgin
posted by codi bennett , Jan 24, 2011
The following morning Dr. Hudson educated us on skin cancer, the different types, the different stages and directed us in what our course of action was. I needed to have surgery that was out of his scope of practice. He contacted a surgeon who set up a consult with us and my introduction to the world of cutting began. I was scheduled for surgery the following week, on December 15.
Surgery. This leads to another opportunity for me to have great anxiety. Until this point I really haven’t had any sicknesses, major illnesses, or anything. I’ve only broken one bone and that was just 2 years ago [and the Lord miraculously healed it overnight]. Until Londyn was born in 2006 I had never been to the hospital for anything. I’ve never even had the chickenpox. Nothing. Nada.
I had so many questions and had to fight my urge to research till wee hours of the night and think I can analyze myself healed. I knew I needed to educate myself and learn about what was happening in my body, and that was okay. I also knew the course of the next week could be a major window for the enemy to introduce fear if I allowed it - and for me that meant not researching with my every spare moment. [Ha, thankfully I don’t have many ‘spare‘ moments anyway with the 3 littles.] We made the decision not to communicate anything [except for our close family and our senior pastors] until after surgery when we knew more. Because no one really knew my news it really helped me to go about life as normal that week and not focus on my worries.
Right before my surgery I met with a dear friend and confidant, Jill Hamilton. Jill has recently surmounted the mountain of miracle with cancer herself. God has shown Himself so faithful through her experience and I can’t help but think about all the ways He positioned her to be a strength to me. Jill is one of the most educated and researched people I know in the field of nutrition and health and she was no doubt, my strongest advocate in understanding my whole situation and preparing my heart for everything - from the surgery to the information...the recovery and the lifestyle changes I needed to make. I am forever grateful to Jill and thankful to God for Jill’s story.
I have two sister-in-laws that have also been in recent surgeries that were amazing supports to me. I used the term surgery virgin... because I was. Even though I hate, hate, hate that they had to be in circumstances that required surgery I’m confident the Lord used their situation in my life. I know often the Lord is asked WHY He allows such tragic circumstances to invade our lives. I’m sure He has a unique reason for each and every single one... He can do that - He is a sovereign God and sees all, knows all. For me, I define these tragic circumstances as equipping us to serve those around us. Even though Jill’s situation was the most terrible thing ever - perhaps in her whole life - God used it in mine. It was used for good. In spite of how unwelcome the circumstances were for my sisters, the Lord wrapped them up as a gift for me. I needed the ladies around me that were able to be empathetic to me. Don’t lose hope when the worst of the worst knocks at your door. It will knock at someone else’s and you’ll be able to guide them how to pray, what to say and offer them hope just as I was offered.
-cjb-
thank you for sharing! i have been glued to the computer reading the entire account. i have been praying for you so much!