AmilyFay

to be continued...  [click here to start from beginning]

-cjb-

I don't recall these prayers to emerge heroic.  Quite the opposite - I communicate this in all vulnerability.  I was perplexed and disoriented how something so vile could be in my body.  Apart from a few [tremendously] foolish years in the tanning bed, and dark chocolate addiction, I have always fostered good health.  I work-out, take vitamins, eat my greens and [I thought] was fairly aware of health related risks and how to avoid them.  Discernibly, I thus felt awkwardly challenged by this poison in my body.  In that first moment of frailty I experienced my husband rise to a level of strength on my behalf that I don't know I would have been exposed to without a situation of this nature.  It made me thankful.  I am married to a very Godly man, and during those prayers and tears my husband's trust in God was laid bare and I was honored to be his wife and the subject of his fervent prayer.


Without James' leading it's quite likely I would have responded in intense fear and anxiety.  It’s quite possible I would have spent hours, even that night, researching and Googling every possible form of cancer known to man.  [Which absolutely would have increased my anxiety].  My husband's leading directed me to fall on God and trust His omnipotence and goodness through even Cancer.


to be continued...  [click to continue]


-cjb-

Apart from that unsightly black hole, I was carefree in the matters of what once was that ‘natural tattoo’. I had no ongoing thoughts or concerns about it whatsoever. Then again, if you know me, you can vouch that my personality does tend to be somewhat carefree [or maybe careless?!].  I really don't carry paranoia about much of anything.  The following day we loaded up our tribe for a voyage to scenic Nashville to enjoy the gourmet Cracker Barrel for Thanksgiving with our good, long-time friends, The Turners. [This very well could be a new tradition, by the way].  We enjoyed a [dare I use the word] fabulous time together and returned home to enjoy the official start of the Christmas season [woot, I adore Christmas].


That next night James and I were sitting down to a movie together. The kids were in bed and the house was quiet, we had brewed a pot of coffee and popped some homemade popcorn and were snuggled under a blanket together getting ready to enjoy an 'at-home date'. Just as we were pushing play, I received a phone call. James detected by my response on the phone that it was a serious matter. Our microwave had been broken for several weeks and he later divulged to me that the overwhelming fear going through his mind was that the repair company was informing me our most imperative kitchen device was either irreparable or equally as terrifying, that the restoration cost was exorbitant.

Thank You, Jesus, the microwave still works!

Whilst I, on the phone, was thinking nothing of the microwave. The call I had received was, of course, from the infamous Dr. Hudson. He let me know that he wanted to see me as soon as possible and expected that he would need to "do some more work" on me...[I know, right...what an interesting choice of words]. Dr. Hudson informed me that he had sent my skin lesion for a biopsy and the results were malignant and proved I had skin cancer. Dr. Hudsons voice was earnest and ironically good-natured: “Mrs. Bennett, I’m so sorry to tell you this, you have Melanoma.”


to be continued... [click to continue]


--side note: no matter what i do my fonts before/after the microwave photo will not match.  soooo frustrating.--


-cjb-

My expectations for the dermatologist appointment didn’t go beyond a once-over and a good reminder about sunscreen. I came prepared with my list of questions and presumed to be in and out in 30 minutes. In light of such expectations, I had not arranged for all my three kiddies to be elsewhere and so had my eldest, Londyn Aleise and the babe with me. Dr. Hudson looked me over and we had amusing banter about LSU and the Razorbacks. He had enlightening humor of our respected pastor, Rick Bezet and it was all very light and going according to my predictions. At that moment it took an amusing turn. Dr. Hudson noticed a particular mole near my hip that he thought should be removed. [My honest thought: "whatever, doc."] My expectation was that he would present me with my options for excising it, offer me to come back without my small children present and we would discuss a course of action. Nope. Rather than discussion, Hudson moved into action. He had me hop up on the table, donned just in a gown, might I add, and pumped me up with some local anesthesia. Suggesting to Londyn that she take a seat across the room, he whipped out a shiny scalpel and removed the menacing little mole. [See below to determine if you too have a likewise menacing mole!]
All the while, I'm doing my best to avert Londyn's curious eyes from the portentous procedure. After thoroughly cutting out the area, he proceeded to cauterize it - to which came the inquisitive young lady to my right, "Mommy, what's that smell!?" Of course, the scent to which little Londyn was being introduced was the aromatic fragrance of burning flesh. Poor girl must’ve been so confused and traumetized. Once the doctor finished and left the room, I quickly dressed myself and delicately attempted to explain to my innocent 4-year old why a strange man, not her father, was looking upon my bareness and giving me shots and using tools her innocent eyes had never seen. I think I managed fairly well to impede her suspicion of the intensely awkward encounter. Nonetheless, considering the black hole I was left with in place of my once natural tattoo [aka, the mole] we both got much more than we expected.


to be continued... [click to continue]

-cjb-

I initiated a blog a couple years ago and never devoted the time to it. Thus, it never developed into anything read worthy [as you can see below]. As of recent, some circumstances have unfolded in my life that make blogging seem more attractive, or at minimum, more necessary, to communicate the array of my thoughts and feelings on such episodes.

My perspectives have been altered, my thought processes have been challenged, my ego has been scotched, my desire to learn has been enlarged, above all, my God has been glorified; and my need for Him has been amplified... these are the musings of such developing events - may you be encouraged, energized and enlightened. Or at least be entertained!

Children are no small on-taking. Least of all, the expense of one. The average, uncomplicated, delivery is about $13,000. That's just to welcome baby into the world. To actually leave the hospital, you must prove you've adequately supplied the gear necessary to decorate such a child with coordinating carseat and burpcloth. A minimal cost of say, $2000. Stop by BabyCenter [one of my fave baby websites] to add up your own costs if you're expecting at http://www.babycenter.com/baby-cost-calculator. Interesting to play with, even if you aren’t expecting a new baby!

All that to say, when we have a baby, and thereby meet our [rather high] deductible we like to take advantage of the already spent funds by making good on any other healthcare visits we see fit. Our insurance pays 100% once our deductible is met so it’s a ‘great deal’.

With the birth of our third baby, Reeves Adler, I was in just such a position to make those appointments and had made arrangements to visit the dermatologist. I had not been to a dermatologist in over 15 years, and as the big three-oh [side note: I am pretty darn excited to turn 30] looms in 2011 I saw fit to get my ivory skin a check-up.

to be continued... [click to continue]

-cjb-

DECADE from New Life Church on Vimeo.
-cjb-

at present, blogging seems like one of the most time consuming and needless things. yet, i admit, i do enjoy to sit and write. focus on my own thoughts and let them speak to me as my fingers chatter on the keyboard. so here it goes... some posts will be thoughtful, some informational and still even more will be just silliness. I am not certain of the frequency, but I am determined to be a "blogger" in 2011.

i've enjoyed being a blog creeper for a couple years now... so i invite you to creep as well. and by all means, comment if you feel so inclined!
-cjb-